


wherever you are is my home

by brucexselina



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Bellamy finally getting that drink, Clarke with a steel chair! also getting that drink!, F/M, Fluff, The 100 (TV) Season 4, but what's that I see?, for flavor, oh and a dash of, this is fluff right?, well sorta (actually she doesn't but technicalities), who knows my house my rules
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-05
Updated: 2020-12-05
Packaged: 2021-03-10 02:35:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,302
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27886873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brucexselina/pseuds/brucexselina
Summary: 4x08 party time but with Clarke.this episode aired years ago, and I'm still salty that Clarke wasn't there.
Relationships: Bellamy Blake/Clarke Griffin
Comments: 4
Kudos: 37





	wherever you are is my home

**Author's Note:**

> I know that Bellamy took the rover back to Arkadia at the end of 4x06, but Clarke also has a rover because I say so. I still don't really know how to write, so we're just rolling with the punches folks.

Clarke parks the rover at Arkadia and hops out. With their nightblood trials going on back at Becca’s lab, they need all of the medical supplies they can get. So, Abby asked Clarke to drive back to Arkadia as quickly as possible to get extra medical supplies. Considering that they are literally on borrowed time, Clarke should try to drive back to the lab tonight, but it’s pitch black outside, and Clarke hates driving in the dark.

As she’s walking over to the medbay, she hears laughter and loud music. _Huh_ , she thinks. Last time she was here everyone was practically in a comatose state due to their dread over the inevitability of Praimfaya. She’s got the time, so she might as well see what’s going on.

Her first glimpse of the scene is of a bunch of people. As she steps closer, she sees a familiar face in Harper, who is currently doing an odd pop-and-lock move on the dance floor. It would be funny if Clarke wasn’t so confused by the party going on around her. She thought everyone morbidly accepted their oncoming death, but apparently not. 

Clarke walks up the ramp to stand next to the bar, and takes a scan of the room. She sees a few original members of the 100, along with a few familiar faces from around camp. 

Her thoughts are interrupted when a figure sidles up next to her on her right.

“Think we’re having too much fun? Don’t worry, we’ll all be dead in a month. I know you’re more than capable of killing us all in one fell swoop, but how about we give something else a chance to do that.” Jasper’s bitter voice chimes.

At first, she was willing to take the brunt of Jasper’s anger, but now she’s sick of it. Like he said, they all might be dead in a month, and she doesn’t want to spend it groveling at the feet of her former friend.

“Jasper, go talk to someone you actually want to talk to.” She replies cooly. 

“Nah, I’d rather spend my time with her royal highness Wanheda.” Jasper replies mockingly.

Fine. Jasper can do whatever the hell he wants, but she wants to try to have some fun.

She peruses the room with her eyes for Harper again, figuring she’ll have fun with her, when she sees Bellamy. Jesus, he’s practically been wearing the same outfit since they landed, but he looks unfairly good in his Ark-issued jacket and tan t-shirt. She loves Harper, but if these really are their last moments on Earth, she wants to spend them with him.

She turns to Jasper, gives him a nod in acknowledgement, and turns back to where Bellamy is. Just as she is about to start walking over to him, though, she sees he is not alone. The crowd shifted, and now she can see he is holding hands with a blonde girl. _Bree_ , she absentmindedly thinks. And he looks happy. They’re standing close to one another and smiling. 

She’s okay. This is completely okay. Bellamy practically resembles a Greek god, so it would be stupid of her to think that nobody would be interested in him. This is fine. 

Her face must betray her because she hears Jasper give a dry chuckle.

“Thought you could string him along forever?”

Clarke’s head snaps to the side to look at Jasper incredulously. “What are you talking about?” She asks in a high-pitched voice. 

“Come on Clarke, we both know you put bullets in people’s hearts, don’t act like you don’t break them as well.” He replies in a detached tone. 

“I- Jasper-“

“Save it. For once, he looks relaxed.” Then, a thoughtful look crosses Jasper’s face. “For once, he’s doing whatever the hell he wants.” 

She turns her gaze from Jasper back to Bellamy. He does look happy. He looks happy, no thanks to her. She was wrong. This is not fine. He’s her one source of happiness, and she’s the exact opposite for him. How could she have gotten this all wrong? Just yesterday, when she interrupted him mid-sentence when he was saying if he didn’t see her again, she was convinced he was going to say something in regards to his feelings for her. Looking at him now, she can tell she was wrong. 

Jasper continues, as if a war isn’t going on inside her head. “Stay if you want, but just let him be.” With that, he walks into the crowd. 

Clarke takes a deep breath, but it’s not enough. She tries to blink away her tears, but that action only causes them to fall in quick succession of one another. Without looking at the party again, she turns back to the ramp and walks down. She’ll wake up early tomorrow morning, get the medical supplies, and leave. Right now, all she wants to do is lay in bed. She speed walks through the Ark’s hallways, finally reaching her room. She yanks open the door, kicks off her boots, and collapses onto the bed. Clarke wraps her jacket tightly around herself and brings her knees up to her chest, trying to appear as small on the outside as she feels on the inside. 

-

Bellamy stalks up to Monty and Harper in the mess hall with a dull headache. Luckily, last night, he was smart enough not to drink his bodyweight in moonshine, unlike some of the other delinquents, judging by the way they are walking around the mess right now, as if they are still drunk. 

“How you holding up?” Monty asks with a knowing smirk.

“Funny.” Bellamy deadpans in a non-response. Monty laughs, but is interrupted as Jasper clambers over to them, shoving himself between Monty and Harper and putting a hand on both of their shoulders. 

“My fellow party people! How we feelin’ on this fine morning?” Before Jasper gets a response, he continues, “Practically had the whole squad back together again last night, huh? The delinquents, us, Clarke-“

“Clarke was here last night?” Bellamy interrupts. He looks at Monty and Harper, who appear just as confused as he is.

“Yes, sir. We were all lucky enough to be in the presence of the Commander of Death herself.” 

Annoyance weighs out Bellamy’s curiosity, and he quickly snaps, “Don’t call her that.” Jasper gives him no response, so he continues, “You sure it was Clarke? I didn’t see her.”

“Maybe you didn’t see her because you were too busy with a different blonde.” Harper quips. Monty laughs, though tries to smother it with his hand upon Bellamy’s glare.

“We have all our jokes out now?” Bellamy asks in annoyance. Harper and Monty nod, with the former adding in an eye-roll. “Good.” Bellamy says. Turning his attention back on Jasper, he asks “Where did you see her? How could I not see her? Is she-“

Jasper interrupts him with a laugh, “Dude, take a breath. You may have not seen her, but she definitely saw you.” With that, Jasper turns to leave, but Bellamy grabs his arm. 

“Stop being vague and give me a clear answer.” Bellamy is starting to lose his patience, if he even had any to begin with. He lets go of Jasper’s arm, crosses his own, and waits for an answer.

Jasper sighs dramatically, as if this is causing him great pain, and says, “I saw her standing by the bar and decided to talk to her for a bit. Harper was right, you were too busy with Bree to notice. She sure did see you, though.” Then, with a cheery smile, “Hope you had fun with the better blonde!” With that, he makes his exit. 

Monty and Harper wait for his response, but Bellamy doesn’t say anything. She saw him? Why didn’t she say anything? Did she see him with Bree? Was she jealous? He hates the fact that that thought brings him a little bit of satisfaction, but then he remembers he had to see her be with Finn and Lexa, and he doesn’t feel too bad about it. 

Hold on, is she still here? He looks up to ask Jasper, forgetting he made his exit. Without telling Monty and Harper goodbye, he makes off to Clarke’s room. He doesn’t even know what he wants to say to her. Sorry? Bree asked him to dance, not the other way around? He’s never had a real home his entire life, but with her he feels like he’s finally found one? Probably best not to go with that last one.

He finally makes it to Clarke’s room.

He knocks. “Clarke?” He calls out.

He knocks a little louder. “Sleepin’ in?” He tries to joke, but feels a little awkward considering he’s talking to a door. “Here goes nothing.” He mutters to himself. He gently opens the door, and his eyes fall immediately to the bed.

It’s empty. She’s gone.

“Fuck!” He yells, way louder than he expected. Praimfaiya is right around the corner, he has no idea when he’ll see her again (if he’ll even see her again), and now she might think he’s interested in someone else. Maybe if she would’ve let him finish his damn sentence the other day this could’ve all been avoided. 

“Bellamy?” A tentative voice calls from behind him. He’d know that voice anywhere. 

He whips around. “Clarke! What are you doing here?”

With damp hair, she shifts from foot to foot, shoving her hands deeper into her pockets. “This is my room?” It comes out as a question, rather than her stating a fact.

“Got me there.” Bellamy tries to joke while rubbing the back of his neck nervously. He immediately drops his hand, trying to stop the nervous tick, and looks around her room. “Why are you at Arkadia?” He asks her.

“I originally came for medical supplies, but my mom radioed this morning and said they don’t need them anymore. She told me I could stay here, so that’s what I’m doing.” She replies, looking uncomfortable. _Wow, this is going great_ , he sarcastically thinks. He was desperately in search of Clarke a minute ago, and now he has no clue what to say.

“Didn’t see you at the party yesterday.” He tries, but realizes quickly that was the wrong thing to say when her face falls. He can’t help it, but part of him wonders if she really is jealous. 

She tries to recover, changing her face to a neutral expression. “There was a party? I didn’t know that.” She replies. 

“Huh, then Jasper must have ran into the other Clarke yesterday.” Bellamy says with some bite to it. If he’s connected the dots correctly, she’s jealous. If she’s jealous, she must like him, at least a little bit. For some reason, maybe because they could all literally die in a couple weeks, he feels ready to talk it out between them. He’s done waiting, done overthinking every interaction they have. They need to have this talk right now, or they never will. 

She looks taken aback, trying to delay her response by squeezing out the excess water in her hair. “Well, I- uh…” She stammers. 

A wave of different emotions crash over her face, emotions that Bellamy can’t decipher, and then she starts talking again, louder this time. “I did go last night, okay? I did! And I left because I was mad. Mad at you,” She states while poking him in the chest (when did she get so close?), “because you were flirting with someone who wasn’t me!” She finishes, breathing heavily. 

He’s stunned. He’s been waiting so long for her to give any indication that she feels a fraction of what he feels for her.

She takes his silence as rejection. Still staring at him, though now a little more sadly, she releases a shaky breath. “Sorry.” she huffs, trying to force out a laugh, but it sounds too humorless to be considered one.

She takes a few steps back, says, “I’m just gonna,” while gesturing towards the door and taking a few steps back, even though they’re in her room. 

Bellamy finally finds his voice. “Wait.” He says a little too desperately. 

Clarke stops moving towards the door and faces him, a couple of feet between them.

He runs his fingers through his hair a couple of times before saying, “Please don’t tell me you think I’m interested in anyone other than you.”

“What?” She asks, staring at him with wide eyes.

He takes a step closer. “Please don’t tell me, Clarke, that you think I love anyone other than you.”

She opens her mouth, as if to say something, then closes it. Her eyes are rapidly moving back and forth between his own.

He takes another step closer, now with barely any space between them. “Clarke,” He starts softly, “I thought you knew, or at least thought about it.” Clarke huffs out a shaky breath.

He brings his hands up, gently cupping her face, and continues. “I am so sick of this world dictating how we live our lives. For once, I want to do something because I want to, not because I have to. And I want- Clarke, I want to be with you. I want to be near you just because I can, I want to sit next to you in front of the fire and hold your hand, I want to kiss you good morning and goodnight and all the times in between. I’ve wanted these things for so long, but never told you, and I’m sorry for that. But we can change that right now. Screw everything else, let’s do something because we want to.”

Clarke looks awestruck, saying “Bellamy-” but instead of finishing her sentence, she surges forward and kisses him. _This_ , Bellamy thinks, _this is what finally coming home feels like._

**Author's Note:**

> Jasper was lowkey speaking facts, but you didn't hear that from me.
> 
> also
> 
> Bellamy: I've connected the dots  
> Also Bellamy: You didn't connect shit  
> Bellamy: I've connected them


End file.
